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January, 2024:

A compendium of reactions to recent news

Danielle Smith in a time warp

I note that in Alberta the Danielle Smith government has done a time warp and thinks they’re living under a 2035 federal government led by none other than 63-year-old Justin Trudeau! (I wonder if he’s still as beautiful as he is here and now in 2024?!) It’s Trudeau’s fault that whoever is in charge of electrical power in Alberta dropped the ball and had to buy power from the nasty, commie pinko NDP government in British Columbia! Yup, those nasty, commie pinkos are really good at running economies into the ground and then begging for help from right-wing economies, as we all know. Even Washington State in the good ol’ (definitely non-commie pinko) US of A had to buy power from us commie pinkos in the recent cold snap in this part of the world!

Editorialising teleprompter readers

I noticed last night (18 January) that Chris Gailus, one of the Global BC teleprompter readers, tried to make some sort of off-the-cuff editorial remark during the six-o-clock news, but stumbled and ended up dragging it our for more seconds than was really necessary. I can’t even remember what it was about, but I think it might have been about driving in Vancouver snow. Weirdly, a BBC teleprompter reader also made an editorial comment yesterday! I’m actually quite shocked at that, because I usually hold up their teleprompter readers as the epitome of professionalism, but I suppose standards are slipping there as well!

The Commission for Complaints for Telecom-television Services (CCTS)

There was a report on the news about the rise in the number of complaints from the public to the CCTS. It was a masterpiece to see the nuanced, massaged reactions from the cell-phone companies to the complaints they had received! “Yes, we know we have a huge number of complaints, and even one compliant is too many, but we have the fewest complaints per subscriber with ringworm!”, said the spokesperson for RogersBellTelus! Jesus H. Christ! What kind of warped and twisted upbringing and education do you have to have to come up with their beautiful lies?! (I think they call it “positive spin”!)

Milani Plumbing Vancouver review

Every time I see one of their ads on TV I just shake my head. We used to be good customers of theirs. Then we moved, and I guess we just used a plumber that was familiar with the townhouse complex in which we lived. Then we moved again, and when our first plumbing issue came up, who did we call? Milani, of course. There was no question and no hesitation. I don’t remember whether or not I was informed when I made the appointment or afterwards that they had a minimum $200 charge just for showing up (I’d have to re-read my notes), but it wouldn’t have made any difference because I assumed that the person who came out would do the job we needed and the bill would likely come out to more than $200 anyway. No problem.

But the guy that showed up essentially just told us what we already knew about the problem (“You have a problem!”) and had no intention of fixing it and installing what we wanted on the gas line! He was just there to collect the $200. When he left I was standing there $200 poorer and still with the plumbing problem! So I called Milani and complained, and I was informed several times by the person I spoke to that their service technicians don’t carry around the full stock of a Home Depot in their vans! WTF??! Who thinks that they do?! (Obviously that’s something drummed into their heads in what little training they get, and I’m sure they love telling stories around the water cooler about their stupid customers who they think expect that!) The problem we had needed just some expertise, and may have required some parts that any journeyman plumber would have in his tool kit, never mind in his spacious three-quarter-tonne van or one-tonne cube van. I will grant that we didn’t expect him to have the part we needed for the installation on the gas line, but we expected that we’d pay for the hot-water issue to be fixed, and then he’d come back — maybe another day — with the parts needed for the gas work. And we expected that the work for both would add up to more than $400!

Anyway, after I had been treated like an idiot by the idiot on the phone at Milani, I told them not to bother coming back with the part for the gas-line installation. Presumably it became part of the huge inventory that their plumbers carry around with them in their Home Depot-sized vans. We have never called them back to come and work on our plumbing ever since, and never will. But clearly they still get a lot of suckers paying them $200 a shot to come and do nothing for them; that’s how they pay for these expensive TV ads!

Instead of a flashy plumbing company who can afford to run TV ads we got an old guy (named Gabriel [Gabe] Khoo) in to do the work, and we’ve used him ever since. He shows up with a white van full of tools and parts and doesn’t rip us off for $200 a shot just to show up and tell us what we already know. He’s better than Milani Plumbing in Vancouver and their painted trucks and flashy uniforms any day!

The Cosmopolitan Las Vegas, Review

Welcome to Shitty Las Vegas, Nevada

Welcome to Shitty Las Vegas, Nevada. (Picture courtesy of Joao Carlos Medau. CC BY 2.0 Deed. Modified.)

OMG! Where do I start?!

TL;DR: Don’t stay at The Cosmopolitan in Las Vegas! NEVER EVER stay at The Cosmopolitan! That’s what we’ve been telling everyone we know.

Our troubles with our Christmas getaway started before we even checked in, with their wifi. It wouldn’t work, despite the fact that my phone connected to all other wifi hotspots with no problems. At the check-in desk the agent suggested I try other of their multiple networks from our room. I did … of course. I also rebooted my phone and reset wifi settings back to their defaults. I managed to connect another phone (not mine, and my laptop) by using the web browser and bypassing all of the SSL errors with which I was presented. Cool, so I try that on my phone. No go. Call “guest services”. Their position is that the wifi is working, so it’s my phone that’s the problem … or my phone company! (WTF?!) I should call them instead. They also helpfully suggest I should reboot my phone, but my suggestion that they reboot their network doesn’t fly, despite the fact that the problem is obviously not that their wifi isn’t working, it’s that their own connection and authentication process is broken.

Keep in mind that I’m not trying to get online to play Wordle; I’m trying to get online because my business requires I be connected 24/7 (or as near as possible) to monitor systems and be available if there are problems. My ability to do that is what allows me the ability to go on holidays and patronise hotels!

So after a sleepless night worrying that things could be going wrong and I’m incommunicado, I try again in the morning. This time I managed to connect with my browser by bypassing and dismissing all of the SSL errors (caused by the configuration of their systems!) in my web browser. Wifi worked for the remaining four days we were at the hotel.

Back to the check-in: We were early. We knew that, and we politely asked (not demanded) if it would be all right if we checked in early and got our room, since we had taken a very early-morning flight and hadn’t slept much the night before. After appearing to hammer out “War and Peace” on his keyboard, the agent very kindly informed us that the type of room we had booked wasn’t currently available but, for an extra $75(!) per night (which he made sure to point out that he had reduced to $50 a night!) we could upgrade and move in right away. (At other of the many times we were at the front desk we heard other guests being “helpfully” upgraded. Not that I’m suggesting it’s an ongoing scam at all!) Anyway, we reluctantly accepted the “upgrade”, as we were exhausted. We went straight to our room and passed out for three hours.

The next day we returned to our room and our key cards wouldn’t work. Great! Back down to the front desk — not a short walk! — for at least the fourth time in two days. The agent (who seemed reasonably competent and on-the-ball) immediately identifies the problem as being the battery in the door lock, and says that someone will be right up to fix it, in five minutes. So we dash up to make sure we’re there. We could have left the hotel and gone and spent our time doing more touristy things instead of waiting at the hotel, but we were told it would only be five minutes! After mentioning the problem to the cleaning staff member on the floor after waiting for some time (way longer than five minutes), she calls security (the only party she can apparently contact) and asks them to relay to the facilities department that we’re waiting, and that at least one of us needs to go to the toilet … having just availed ourselves of the most expensive buffet I’ve ever seen in my life! After another while a security guard shows up but he cannot get in either, and he also identifies the problem as being the battery! (Congratulations, Einstein!) We pointed out that the problem had already been identified. He then suggests I’d better go and find a public toilet to use.

So off I go to find the toilet to which he directed me. It’s closed! I eventually find another. I sit down and immediately my body relieves itself; I was that desperate. As my back end does its business, my front end realises that there’s no toilet paper! No effing toilet paper when it’s too late for me to find another stall with any dignity! After having a few minutes to contemplate my problem I decide to use the disposable seat covers to wipe my ass. Have you ever done that? Well, they kinda work, but they’re smooth, so there’s no real friction to do the job properly. When I’d used a few of those to my relative satisfaction I pulled up my pants and made the third trip to the front desk to enquire whether or not we’d ever be able to get back into our room. As I was dealing with the agent my partner texted me to tell me that the technician had finally arrived. I told the agent how disgusted we were — about waiting an hour and forty minutes, and having no toilet paper with which to wipe my ass — and she said they would refund us “a couple of nights of the resort fee“. (That is a direct quote.) My partner’s response to that via text was, “I’ll take $100 off!” (The “resort fee” was about $50 per night!) So we were relatively happy with that — even though you’d think this significant extra fee (on top of their published room rate advertised with Expedia!) would be an incentive to the hotel to provide decent service, but the story continues when we check out.

Besides the check-out process, here’s a bullet list of several other issues:

  • Plumbing noises!: Apparently this is a new building, but the all-night plumbing noises were crazy!
  • Creaking toilet door: Can’t use the toilet in the middle of the night without waking up your partner. I suppose we could have had this fixed, but we’d had enough of dealing with guest non-services by then.
  • Regular TV seemed to be continuously interrupted by in-house adverts, in the same way that Youtube videos are interrupted by ads.
  • Slow Internet: I noticed when my laptop was doing an operating system update that the download speed seemed to be slower than molasses in January.
  • Smoke: Whether we were in the lobby or on our balcony, we were surrounded by smoke. On the balcony it was marijuana smoke, and in the lobby The Cosmopolitan must have paid a bargain-basement price for their HVAC system.

If that list was all of the issues we had, they’d be no worse than any other hotel. But The Cosmopolitan went the extra mile to ensure that we were well and truly dissatisfied, pissed off, and angered.

Finally, on our last night there we phoned guest services to enquire about a late check-out the next day, as our flight was not until late at night. Again, we realised that we were asking for a courtesy, but considering how much trouble The Cosmopolitan had already put us through we didn’t think it was a huge ask. We were told that it would likely not be a problem because they were not fully booked, but that we should check in the morning. Cool. So in the morning we checked as instructed, but suddenly in fewer than twelve hours they were now fully booked, and a late check-out was not possible. So we scrambled to shower and pack. We tried to check out on the TV, but it didn’t work. At the desk we were told that the “couple of nights of resort fees” we were to be refunded was actually only one night! Despite our pointing out the lie, the agent wasn’t budging.

So from start to finish — literally! — The Cosmopolitan fucked us over and lied to us. There is not a snowball’s chance in hell we’ll ever patronise this establishment again, and we’ve been telling everyone we know this story in great detail!

A squirrel ate my cookies!

Over Christmas I was given a box of cookies/biscuits from Toronto. I suspect they were given to me because of the name of the company that made them: Craig’s Cookies. Catchy name. πŸ™‚

Craig's Cookies

Craig’s Cookies.

I had a look at their website and read their FAQs, one of which is, “A squirrel ate my cookies!” It’s rather amusing!

A squirrel ate my cookies!

A squirrel ate my cookies!

Motorola for the win

As you’re aware if you follow this blog — all two of you — I recently broke my cell/mobile phone and needed to replace it. I know, this is stunning news that you just never hear and likely haven’t experienced yourself, but bear with me. πŸ™‚ Although I had a cell/mobile phone long before many people did, I essentially gave up on them and stopped owning one for many years due to the way that the Canadian cell phone oligopoly rapes their customers.

In 2017 I decided to buy a phone from an American supplier — Ting, who operated based on paying only for the services you wanted and used — even though I was in Canada. Ting was a mobile virtual network operator owned by Tucows (before they sold it), a Canadian company who also own OpenSRS, a domain registrar who operate based on the reseller model. One of these days I will write more about them and why I left them after almost twenty years, but it should suffice to say that they didn’t (and don’t) live up to their own hype. Tucows never opened Ting in Canada because of how fucked-up the Canadian cell phone market is, and they essentially said that to their Canadian clients … without using the four-letter word I used. πŸ™‚

However, Ting was awesome for the approximately two years I used them. (They actually did live up to their hype!) They’re not any more, sadly, because they now operate based on the plan system like just about everyone else, rather than actually charging you for what you need and use. (Tucows sold Ting Mobile.)

Through Ting I bought a phone that was adequate for my needs, a US$60 smartphone. Why didn’t I spend a thousand dollars on an Iphone? Because I don’t give a fuck about fads like owning the latest and greatest tracking device. Simply put, I just needed a portable computer in my hands that would tell me when I had email that may or may not need my immediate attention. I roamed in Canada, of course, but that was still cheaper in the long run than owning a Canadian cell phone. Bizarre, but true! I also wasn’t scrolling through Facebook endlessly and watching videos on it; all it did, essentially, was check my email. (In January 2024, after Rogers and Bell coincidentally raised their rates at the same time by about the same amount — after Rogers bought Shaw and promised that being allowed to do that would cause rates to be lowered! — I’m again hearing other Canadians talking about getting a non-Canadian phone and roaming! With VoIP and Internet-based messengers like Signal, why not?! Welcome to the 21st century!)

I still have that $60 cell phone! I occasionally use it on wifi, but I suspect it wouldn’t be welcome on any cell networks in 2024, or be able to download the latest apps.

In 2019 I was enticed to join Freedom Mobile, to whom I refer as Troublesome Mobile. I am not generally someone who looks for the cheapest, nastiest deals around — quality is not cheap, but quality isn’t to be found in this industry at any price! — but considering the extent to which the Canadian cell industry, as I say, rapes the Canadian population, the deal was good for what I needed, a portable computer that let’s me check my business email when I’m out. I don’t know anyone who pays $15 a month (before taxes) to be connected wherever they go.

Troublesome Mobile offered a Motorola phone at a reasonable price, so I went for it. I had bought a Samsung tablet a few years before but, as I said at the time, “In a nutshell, I am mightily disappointed in my Samsung/Android tablet.” So there was no way I was gong to acquire a Samsung phone, and I never will seeing as they have become the Apple of the Android world. When looking for a new phone late last year, I decided on another cheap, unlocked phone from an electronics retailer. I mean, smartphones have been around for years now, right? Apple is up to the Iphone 132 now or something, I believe, and each iteration is a vast improvement over the one before, right?! Well, apparently not. I was well aware that my old Motorola had Motorola apps on it that imparted more functionality on the phone than what comes with Android the operating system, but I naΓ―vely figured that by 2024 those things would be standard in the OS. Ha! They aren’t, but I knew I’d adapt … until my new Cat Phone wouldn’t play nicely with my network of (limited) choice.

So I returned it and, as I said, walked into the trap of the Canadian cell phone oligopoly and crawled back to Troublesome Mobile on my hands and knees and handed over a couple of hundred dollars for another, low-end Motorola. Now, with my new phone, I can again karate chop my torch on. Yippee. Sadly, I learned that the feature of my old phone whereby I could do a double wrist twist to turn on the camera doesn’t work any more. As I said, new versions of software don’t imply improvement.

I readily admit that my vast experience will all of three brands of smartphones doesn’t hold a candle to the experience of selfie queen Kim Kardashian, who can afford to buy (or is probably given) a new phone every week, but Motorola is one company that I’m reasonably content with … except for the fact that it’s owned by Lenovo, who are based in the hostage-taking PRC. Now all I need is a Motorola sponsorship so that I can get paid for my effusive words of high praise! πŸ™‚